Wednesday 25 May 2011

Funny Bugger

I wasn't planning on writing a blog today but I remember my promise to myself on yesterdays blog that I would try and write one even if it was short. So, this entry is supposed to be short and sweet whether it is or not remains to be seen!
Alan is on afters today so again, I'm home alone. I keep moaning about being on my own all day but actually aside from Alan, Keira and Daisy...I don't actually want any company. Or I might do but just not when people offer. I'm not in the mood to entertain people or even talk to people because all they want to talk about is baby stuff mainly and I'm fed up enough as it is without other people bringing the fact I'm over due to my attention. I don't mind the odd comment now and again but I've got people texting, rining, messaging me every bloody day asking me if there is any signs or how I feel or telling baby to get out. HELLO I'D FUCKING TELL YOU IF THERE WERE ANY SIGNS OF HIM BEING HERE ANY TIME SOON!!! Anyway, I have devised a list of people I am going to tell when I am told by the hospital that I am in active labor and they forsee me giving birth within a number of hours. Then when I've had him, the same people will be the first to know when he is here, his weight and if I'm up to it a picture of him [Yes Jayne, you're on my list!!!] After we are settled on the ward a few hours after having him, everyone else will find out. I'm doing it like this because there are some people who won't allow us to enjoy the first few hours with our baby boy - I'll have constant texts throughout labor and when he's here and to be honest I just don't want it. We've also said we're limiting who can come visit at hospital should I stay in...the only visitors I want aside from Alan is Keira and my brother and his wife.
I have to admit, lately I have been a funny bugger only replying to some texts people send, being slightly off with certain people and just generally being a bit off. I don't mean to and it isn't intentional but people don't realise how hard and stressful and upsetting this is. I understand some people are concerned about me and my baby but honestly, it just does my head in. I don't like fuss it just makes everything feel worse. If they can't understand though, they're not very good friends in my opinion.
Woke up with cold today and feel pretty shitty so don't plan on doing anything other than the ironing and a bit of washing unless I pick up...

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