So I have literally just put Alfie down to sleep after feeding him. He woke up crying at around 11:30pm and it took me a few minutes to settle him. He went to sleep at 8:30pm but boy did he put up a fight! I'm annoyed to constantly hear that he should be sleeping through now because of his age, weight and feeding amounts. I've been told I should seek advice because he doesn't, been told to let him cry and been told not to feed him at night.
What a load of utter bollocks. Every single baby is different. The age, weight or size has nothing to do with them sleeping through. In fact, I know more babies older than Alfie that don't sleep through the night yet. They aren't designed to go for so long and why would anyone want to force them to by refusing to feed them and letting them cry?
I know I'll be up in a few hours time and Alfie will need a little "top up" or just a cuddle and while I am completely knackered and sleep deprived, I don't mind. I didn't have a baby and think for one minute he'd be a good sleeper. Alfie's reflux makes him a high demand, fussy baby but if he wasn't like that he wouldn't be Alfie so I wouldn't change him for the world.
I get a lot of people giving me terrible and (sometimes) cruel (in my opinion) "advice" about how to get Alfie to sleep longer. He isn't tired when he's awake or constantly grumpy so he is getting the right amount of sleep for him be that in day time naps or night time ones. The fact is, he is sleeping just not how other people perceive "normal" to be.
I bought a book in a moment of madness when Alfie was barely sleeping and he, hubby and I were sleep deprived. At first I drank in the authors every word and gave the "routines" a whirl. The set routines didn't last long as I didn't agree with the "techniques" which I never practiced from the start. The author promoted "spaced soothing" which in short means letting baby cry but going back and "shushing" when baby cries. The author advises not to go to baby until he is properly crying. The author also advises babies sleep alone from birth in their own room, they don't get cuddled or soothed to sleep under any circumstances and the baby is fed to a routine set by the book not the baby.
I must have been mad to buy such a book! What a load of bollocks sleep and feed training is. I much prefer the baby led way of doing things even if it means I'm tired. At least I know Alfie will never cry himself to sleep or get so worked up he can't sleep.
Now we do what Alfie wants. I know his sleep cues although sometimes he doesn't show any and goes from happy to screaming in 0.3 seconds! I'm not a fan of "training" babies, they aren't bloody dogs for goodness sake!
I'm knackered and sleep deprived and generally feel rough but Alfie is totally worth it all. So my advice to mummies who are knackered from lack of sleep at night is to go with it. Your baby crying is their way of communicating with you, you wouldn't ignore an adult waking you up for help why ignore a baby? Eventually your baby will learn to go to sleep by themselves, stay asleep for longer and generally sleep better throughout the day and night so keep with it.
Just remember all babies are different and no one knows your baby like you.
Sleep well mamma's and babies for as long or as little as you need xxx
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